Hello beautiful friend and welcome back!
Today I want to touch on something I struggle with so much, still. We’ve all found ourselves in a position where we must let someone go from our lives. You know, like that boyfriend that you know is not the one, or that friend that just grew apart or that disciple that decided to reject the faith, or those Church friends that don’t have your same assignment from God, or that person that continues to break your trust, etc.
I consider myself a very nostalgic person.
Like, I only attended my High School for two years, wasn’t close to anyone, knew I didn’t care much for most of my classmates but STILL cried for days when we graduated because of the thought of things never again being the same and having to let go of all of my classmates.
Now imagine how hard it was for me when I moved from Ecuador to the USA. I wasn’t just leaving my friends behind. I was also leaving my family behind. In just one day I had to leaving absolutely every single thing and person in my life behind. It was hard.
So, I understand how painful it can be to let someone go.
I think the hardest thing for people, about letting someone go from their lives, is coming to terms with that idea that things will never be “the same”.
Which it’s crazy because our lives are a compilation of seasons that are completely different from the last one. So things are, literally, never the same.
Our life is ever-changing and so is the people in it.
It took me years to make peace with this thought. The thought that most people we meet are only meant to be in our lives for a short period. That the people I was the closest within my teens will become strangers in my 20’s. That those that were with me through rough situations will just grow apart. That I will have fallouts with some friends and never makeup and that will serve to uproot people that God didn’t want me to hang out with from my life in the first place.
I hope it doesn’t take you as long as it did me.
I hope you can see the wisdom of God in taking you out of your confort zone or regular life to plant you in a new path with a different direction.
Maybe your future looks different now that this person is no longer there. Or, maybe your afternoons will have a different rhythm without them there. But, don’t allow nostalgia to rob you from discovering new ways your live can be lived with new people it can be enjoyed with.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I have a few life-long friends for whom I’m extremely intentional in putting the work that strong friendships require to stay healthy. Because I believe most people aren’t meant to be in your life forever but I also believe some are.
But it is so important that you discern the difference between people who are meant to be in your life forever and people that are not.
If you find yourself in a time of having to remove someone from your life I encourage you to look at the bigger picture. To find refuge in God and seek Him for strength and guidance.
I would say that the most important thing to do before they completely leave your life or as soon as possible is to forgive them for whatever they had done to you.
It doesn’t serve you any good to continue to replay in your head the different scenarios of how things could have or should have happened.
Dwelling in the past only makes your heart ache again and again.
How about for you? Are you the type of person that can easily let go of people when you know it’s time? Or does it take you a long time to sort of get over it? Let me know in the comments below.